Joy

The weather has been pretty good so we've been able to go to the park, get out of the house and just play.  These are the days when I sit back and watch them and find myself so thankful, so completely overwhelmed in blessings.  

I was at a Christmas social this morning for the women's bible study I attend, to sit and talk with other moms is wonderful.  To come into a home with your hands full of kids and coats, shoes and bags and not be the only one is a blessing.  I get such encouragement from our church, a place where family is such a focus, where children are such blessings.

Sometimes when I'm running my errands the reactions I get for having three close is wonderful.  The small words of encouragement usually come from older couples, ones whose children are long grown-up.  They pat me on the arm and say "I remember those days, cherish them".  Other times, I get looks that aren't so nice, comments of "you must be so busy, how do you cope, are they all yours? do they have the same Dad? (yes - that one came to me when Maddie was about one).

A friend encouraged me once to react to these comments with the words "yes, it can be very busy, but its such blessing".  Kids listen closely, and this response is a good one for them to overhear as well.  The reality is some shopping trips are huge successes, where we stop and count out the apples together or the kids look at the cheeses and tell me which one is the lowest price.  When we play "I spy" in the lineup while waiting.  When we look happy. The other reality is that is not going to always happen, having kids is never picture perfect. My last grocery shopping trip was of me running around, two kids squished in a cart (one crying) and one trailing behind while I grabbed everything I needed and rushed out as fast as I could.  I looked tired, overwhelmed and not so happy.  The kids were fighting and at one point when I was paying for my groceries they started yelling at each other, and I mean YELLING.

The next day was this day, when we ran to the park and I took pictures.  Jacob became a taxi driver and I sat in the play car as he explained the rules of his taxi and he drove me to wherever I wanted to go.  We drove to the zoo, to the ocean and to the mountains.  Kaylin and I were the passengers and I listened as she described what she saw.  And to sit there and listen to the imaginations of your children is a thing of beauty.

To watch them play together, to watch them grow together is sometimes hard to express. Joy, contentment, trust and love all rolled together.

Is life busy?  yes.  Do I get overwhelmed?  absolutely.  Would I change anything? never.

And those negative comments that I sometimes get when I'm out and about?  They are (finally) beginning to not bother me as much.  This is the life that I've been called to, and though outsiders looking in may wonder, I'm learning that its up to me to show them that yes, this task of mothering, of raising children to know Him, it is beautiful, it is a calling and there is joy.  So much joy.

When the Unthinkable Happens

My sleep was far from peaceful last night.  The horrors that we heard over the radio, that we watched on tv making it impossible.  For the school in Connecticut that was under such violence yesterday.   Late yesterday afternoon Drew called me with a warning, watch the news, he said.  Its unfathomable to us that someone is able to do such a thing, and yet we know that Satan's reach is far and deep and unimaginable.  That the depravity of man is capable of such wickedness.

Drew came home from work and sat with the kids, holding them a bit tighter than normal. We mourn for those parents who dropped their kids off at school and came home tonight without them.  For the families that will be without a mother or a father.  We pray for the families and the friends of those who will be entering this Christmas very differently than they thought they would. 

We grieve, for we are reminded of how far the world has fallen, we grieve for the children that were subject to such violence, for those who survived and will have to learn to deal with the knowledge of something very beyond their years.   And yet, we have hope.  This Christmas season we celebrate the birth of the victorious Son.  And when we read the last versus in the Bible (Rev 22:20-21) "He who testifies to these things says, "Yes I AM coming soon.: Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.  The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God's people.  Amen".

And believers will be held united these weeks as their prayers will echo "Come Lord Jesus! Maranatha!" 

Decorating for the Holidays

I'm no decorator.  Its taken me awhile to get used to this fact and not convince myself that I should be, but the truth is that stuff just doesn't bother me.  I can live with crooked lines on my Christmas tree and the fact that there's still a small pumpkin sitting on my shelf.  The unfinished trim in my house doesn't bother me, we'll get to it when time and money allows.  And you know what?  Its okay.  I love enjoying the beautiful decorating of friends and family, I love sitting on the couch sipping tea and drooling over home magazines.  Its just hard for me to find time putting it together in my own home.  I'd much rather spend the afternoon cooking or baking or playing the piano.  And its okay.  

But my house?  It doesn't come naturally to me.  And so our Christmas decorating is more about Drew bringing in the tree.  The kids tearing through the $0.50 bag of decorations I picked up at a garage sale 7 years ago and the music of my childhood playing softly.  Always at one point I stand with my head tilted wondering why my tree doesn't look like it did in my head, and how in the world do people do it.

A complete mystery to me.  And so I gave up, stepped back and the let the kids take over.

Listening to Nana Mouskouri's Little Toy Trains and making hot chocolate for the kids while they proudly place as many balls as they can on one small lower branch. "See Mom, THIS is how you do and its prreeeettty".

At some point in the decorating Drew decided that it was time to introduce the kids to new memories and cranked the song from the Grinch and then called a break in the tree makeover to watch Charlie Brown's Christmas, one of his childhood memories.  This is what makes us work.  We blend our different childhood memories, I get the first half of the night, he gets the second, and during it we blend in our own.  The tree that is quite obviously decorated by children's hands and one that doesn't bother me enough to fix it.

I had never watched a Charlie Brown Christmas, and I must say it was rather intriguing.

And this one's for my mother-in-law who mentioned to me this week that the kids always look so happy on the blog:)  How DARE mommy take away a glass ornament....

Enjoy your weekend all!

On Turning 4

I've been MIA for the last little while, thanks to the wretched cold virus that slammed into our home and latched on tight.  Just when I thought I was feeling better, one whole day wonderfully free of headaches, sore throats and several boxes of kleenex the stomach flu got me.  Such is life when Mama is busy chasing little ones, immune systems weaken when your tired so its no wonder why I got it.  Thankfully, Jacob's birthday showed up and we were all free of any illness and we celebrated with as much energy as we could for this newly turned 4 year old. 

Drew decorated with balloons and streamers the night before, I neglected to take pictures, but this boy was happy.  He was gifted with lego and playmobil, which has proven to be a huge hit. 

I'm not sure who is most intrigued by these gifts, as Drew has been quite eager to show off his building skills to the kids.

This one watches intently as they build.

 We made cake pops for his party.  Huge hit!

Gingerbread men were on the menu to decorate, it kept the little hands of many children busy for awhile.

Its hard to believe that 4 years have gone by with this one in our home.  It seems like so little time and yet they change so much in those 4 years.  He's a different little boy than he was a year ago, less quick in anger, in tempers.  It almost feels like a lifetime ago when I would stand by his bed at night praying for patience for the little boy who pushed me to my max day after day.  I remember sitting on my bed at night wondering what I was doing that was obviously so horribly wrong.  Feeling so beaten, and yet looking back, those are times that brought me to my knees.  I know that feeling won't stay away, its apart of this parenting task that we have been called to.  It will merge again, as we enter new stages and new ages and deal with new challenges.  

This 4 year old though?  He's a happy little guy, busy with trucks and colouring and anything to do with construction.  And I'm thankful for this break, for a time when the household is working well together. 

And now one birthday is behind us, Maddie's is next and from that we jump right into Christmas. 

May you all find quiet moments in this busy season!